Following the American Civil War Sesquicentennial with day by day writings of the time, currently 1863.

Post image for “Anxiety has become our normal condition…”–Adams Family Letters, Henry Adams, private secretary of the US Minister to the UK, to his brother, Charles.

“Anxiety has become our normal condition…”–Adams Family Letters, Henry Adams, private secretary of the US Minister to the UK, to his brother, Charles.

December 26, 2012

Adams Family Civil War letters; US Minister to the UK and his sons.

London, December 26, 1862

…The telegrams announce a battle on the 13th and from the scanty items I infer that it was another Antietam, only worse. In short I am prepared for a complete check and am screwing my courage up to face the list of killed and wounded….

We have our hands full and things are in a very lively state. The notes are becoming savage, but we have a clear case and are making headway. I find myself, I think, of use, and am well content to be here. My former restlessness was caused by the Pope campaign which upset us all. On the whole I would infinitely prefer to be here to going into the army, and it is only when there really seems to be a superior call to the army that I feel disposed to move.

Anxiety has become our normal condition and I find a fellow can dance in time on a tight rope as easily as on a floor. It is harder to keep one’s temper, but even that I now contrive to do in very trying cases. A steady pressure tells better here than anything else, and if our people will be cool, I think we can set England straight….

I have been staying several days at Monckton Milnes’ place in Yorkshire where we had a very jolly little bachelor party….

Even the stoic steadiness of nerve that I am trying to cultivate, shakes under the apprehension of the next news.

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